Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Randomize
