he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
