Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
