I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
