I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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