There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Randomize
