I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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