i just google imaged poop.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
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Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
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