I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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