Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
