im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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