Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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