Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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