Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
