so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
