They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize