2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize