so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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