Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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