Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
