just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
