So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
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