Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Randomize