Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
