then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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