her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
