If i come over, it means nothing
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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