I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
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