Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
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