There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize