Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
