Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Randomize
