Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
he just fucked me for my cheese..
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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