I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
Randomize
