Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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