at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
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I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
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If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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