Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize