I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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