If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize