Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
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Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alive.
So much puke
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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