I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Randomize
