Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
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