When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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