Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
