I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize