So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
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