Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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