i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
