I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Randomize
