Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
