well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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