In the future we'll all be gay
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
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